It’s nearly March. Perhaps you are looking at your New Years’ Resolutions and giving yourself the side eye that more of it isn’t complete or that you are already tired of going to the gym and eating healthy. Perhaps you don’t make resolutions on January 1st; maybe you have goals that you are working on – I know I do. The thing that makes or breaks our ability to succeed is fear. Fear stops us from even trying. Fear tells us not to apply for the new job because we know we won’t get it; or from starting a new project or business that will just fail. Fear keeps us from finishing things we have started and learning new things. Fear tells us we are too old, too out of shape, too [fill in the blank], to do the things we want to do. It messes with our minds and hijacks our plans to be consistent.
But I accept this imperfection. I accept this flaw. The only way to challenge a fear is to acknowledge it’s existence and to challenge it. I am scared of spiders, falling from ladders, and touching my eyeball, among other things. It doesn’t make any sense – a spider is literally hundreds of inches smaller than me, yet the practical application has paralyzing effects. And there are intangible fears like the fear of rejection or failure. As a writer, it is very nerve racking to publish anything. There’s the fear that no one will read it or that you will offend someone, no matter how sincere you are being. And the largest fear is that you won’t like the final publication. There have been many an article that I haven’t written because I was waiting for it to be perfect. Human perfection is a paradox and we have to remember that because we are so hard on ourselves. We have to accept imperfection and know that life will go on and it will all be alright.
Fear helped me to start this blog and it’s super exciting that you are on this journey with me. I don’t have all the answers, but it’s nice to share the answers I do have. And I enjoy learning about other people’s adventures in this journey we call life. Something is always someone’s first time. When we’ve done something a lot we forget how hard it might have been the first time, but it’s about capturing that and sharing that information so that we can empower one another. I’ve moved a million times, so it doesn’t phase me anymore. Sure, I’m a little anxious at the time, but in the end I know it will all work out. And so that is my story that I can tell with my eyes closed. And to someone else that is them stepping outside their comfort zone, jumping out their fishbowl, have you, into the unknown. From living on your own, ziplining, skydiving, and public speaking to playing with spiders and writing a novel, everything can be a big deal to someone. We have to remember not to downplay someone else’s fishbowl.
If I can remember that life is imperfect by nature and that I will make mistakes, I can get over this hump of not even wanting to try. I can write the article, speak the speech, and start the business that I’m scared to start. Falling off the horse is not the failure, but never getting back on prevents the success.
Things happen. Life doesn’t always go according to plan. Accept the imperfection, move on, and let’s get working on our goals!
Happy New Year! – 2 months later. See, better late than never 🙂
Such a great read. I agree with you that Fear can be an impediment to anything if one lets it. Funny enough though, I find things I fear to be the largest and best achievements to get to. There is a sweetness to looking at the end for hope, as you illustrate in your “light at the end of the tunnel” photo. Great job. -Taha
Love your blogs. My natural inclination is to run towards or through fear. This is also taught in my tactical training. It has never been a wrong decision. Hopefully its light and not an oncoming train.
Thanks Patti!